Sunday, September 15, 2019

And Now I Know, Doubt is Who I Am

Joined Twitter in 2009 but did not do much with it until a couple of years ago. Now, I spend at least an hour a day, often more. I've met a great many perspectives, read some awful and wonderful things, and often drop my jaw at the cleverness, insight, pathos, and mirth of all varieties. I learn many new things every day.  Was scrolling through the tweets this evening to review and savor what I'd seen in the recent past when I came upon this one from JohnsHopkinsMedicine.
Since retiring I've been able to review my life and recognize some aspects of myself that I did not perceive earlier.  Have made some positive changes resulting from that introspection.  Looking back I acknowledge often having the problem of being a person who doubts themself obsessively.  Fear and uncertainty also accompanied this.  It has often been difficult to make decisions because I feared I did not have enough knowledge and information.  In the article from which the above tweet originates, the psychiatrist notes that doubt can often be something that characterizes a person's obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD.    He gives examples of patients who continually check that the door is locked.  They repeatedly check it and physically re-lock it. 

About 3% of the population has OCD.  Some fraction of these include this problem with doubt.  Often it limits a person's functioning in life.  Cognitive behaviour therapy can work and failing that,  antidepressants can be effective. 

It would seem the doubt issue would also relate to other personality traits like the ability to take initiative. 

I am a very religious person.  Every day I read something of a religious nature and ponder it.  I do this even though I'm unsure and have many doubts.

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